A Christmas without joy
I was by myself walking the streets of Caloocan on the way to my dentist when I saw more than 5 old ladies in the overpass. They literally live there. I talked to them, and they told me they were suppose to find work here for their families in the province but ended up with nothing. Truly moved, I went to the nearest 7/11 store and bought them food. I don’t do this cause I don’t believe it would help them at all. But I just did. No need to philosophize or make sense of it like I normally would.
I then continue walking to my Dentist’s place when I come across an “eskinita” where more people are literally living on the streets with cardboards as their beds.
I felt that what one can do can never be enough.
Around december time, I was inspired by my mom when she was preparing a Christmas basket for a relative who had very little. And for me, Christmas is truly a holiday of giving and celebrating with the family. That’s why I urged YFC-Ateneo to do something different than just the usual Christmas Party with the alumni. I wanted to have the households to prepare Christmas baskets for the families in an area so that at the very least they can celebrate Noche Buena with each other. I value the time spent of a family over a meal. I value the fact that every family spend Christmas happily together. People in the Execom didn’t want to do it because it was too late already, too crammed with all the preparations needed. But thanks to a few people who believed in the value of the project, we made it happen. Last Saturday, I then come home in Las Pinas right after the Christmas Basket giving in the area for the Christmas Vacation. Having been in the area the whole morning and traveling back home at least 2 hours, I didn’t know the tragedy in Sendong. And how now, almost 600 or more people who died. 600 or more families who have lost their loved ones. More than a thousand, who won’t be able to have a Noche Buena this coming Christmas.
I felt that what one can do can never be enough.
Talking to Dawn about this, she shares about losses for her the whole year round. Most recently was of Crystal, her blockmate, who died because of Sendong and right now for her, it’s just so hard to feel Christmas. With what’s happening, how can you find joy? Joy, which is a very important part of Christmas.
There’s just too much sadness, that the bright and colorful Christmas lights, the big boxes wrapped under the tall beautiful tree, even the warm and loving feeling here at home, cannot cover and make up for all the tragedies in our own lives and in our country. And it’s just so hard especially for me, because it’s just this time that I am truly getting to know and falling in love with my country and fellow filipinos, and this happens.
Is it then a Christmas without joy this year?
I believe, that Christmas joy is truly something that we cannot find here on earth. Because when the world throws tragedies and deaths, and sadness at us, truly joy will be impossible to find, no matter how hard you try. Then the time comes that we see, that Christmas isn’t just the magical feeling the fills every place here on earth, because one day, that can disappear. And it has disappeared in our country right now.
So where is this joy? I don’t know. But I hope to find it in Christ. All we have to hold on to is Jesus Christ, the best gift that we receive everyday, and more so on Christmas.
This year, it’s not a Christmas without joy if we believe that the true joy and hope can be find in Jesus Christ. If joy is truly just Jesus Christ, then it can be a Christmas with joy.
“I guess eto na yung ma rerealize mo na hindi enough ang mga parol and christmas lights and gifts para madama yung Pasko.Christmas has always been a season of giving for me. And a season of receiving, being filled. Ang hirap lang madama nun with all the losses. It’s a challenge, to to find Christmas in Christ alone, kase wala yung iba.” - Dawn
What we can do can never be enough, but with Him, it will be. He is the hope we all need.
This year, is a Christmas in Christ alone.
A reflection with Dawn Satumbaga.
